Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Running (Slowly) Towards Aging

So I'm shopping for Christmas gifts, and I see Justin Bieber's Christmas CD. Miranda <3 Justin Bieber.

"Under the Mistletoe." Hmm. The picture kind of looks like he got caught doing something under the mistletoe. Anyway, I began to wonder how many photos they took to get the "Under the Mistletoe" cover look that Justin Bieber and Miranda wanted.

Which brings me back to me. I went racing last weekend, and ran Colorado Runner's Rudolph's Revenge 10k in a slow 1:02:48. It was actually 6.28 miles, so my watch had me averaging 9:59/mile. Finally, after years of trying, I got back to the 9 minute miles. Barely.

I was all happy and stuff, but yesterday, I say the picture from the race. That's what I look like? OMG, it's scary. I bet Justin Bieber, like any other girl, would never post a picture that, let's say, makes them look normal, bad, or in my case, old and scary.

But, here is DrBubba running his latest 10k in Littleton, Colorado on Saturday, December 17, 2011.

I'm huge.

And I'm old.

Look at that loose skin under my chin. I look like my dad except that he never had a beard. What's really bad is that I look like this after losing 20 lbs since October. No wonder Deborah (wife) wanted me to stop groping her. Ewww.

The weight I can continue to do something about, but the hound-dog skin around my face looks permanent. From here on out, I'm gonna have to start photoshopping my photos. I definitely don't want my wife to see me like this.


Next month on January, 21, 2012, I'll be running Colorado Runner's Frosty Frozen 10 mile race as part of my preparation for the Colorado Marathon in May. Let's hope I look smaller and more handsome in January. Either that or I'm getting my personal photographer to run along backwards in front of me and shoot 100 photos/mile. Out of 1000 pics, there has to one that makes me look Biesirable.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Daddy/Daughter Bonding

Although periodically I'm reminded that she's really my stepdaughter, I consider Lexie to be my daughter, and I treat her exactly the same as Justin and Jarrod. This morning Lexie was finishing her breakfast, and I held out my arms out for a big hug. Lexie looked at me with that "oh, no" look and said, "What?!"

I told her, "Lexie, I wanted to give you a hug and a kiss."

With that she turned to me, closed her eyes, held her head back, and opened up her arms, which granted me her consent to proceed with the kissing thing. I picked her up, gave her a big smooch on the forehead, and set her back down.

As she turned to walk back to her Lucky Charms, Lexie concluded, "I think moms give better kisses than dads."

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Laughing Tube

That's Deborah's mom and dad, Nancy and Ken Griswold, when they visited our house for Thanksgiving a couple of years ago. This year, Nancy was called away to see a very sick friend in Massachusetts that was Deborah's godmother. After traveling to Massachusetts and spending a few days, Nancy began to feel sick. After another day, Nancy was in the hospital in Greenfield with a breathing tube and double pneumonia. She was very sick.

Fortunately, the antibiotics began to work, and although she remained in intensive care, she began improving. When we could finally call, we learned that Nancy could not speak--she could write on a pad and Deborah's sister, Donna, would read the notes back to us. Donna had told us that Nancy was able to get up and walk a little earlier in the day, and as the phone call began, I thought what Nancy needed was a little laughter to make her feel better.

Nancy, "mom," is a free spirit like her daughter Deborah. After our wedding ceremony last year, the DJ was spinning records, and Nancy wanted to dance with me. During a particularly slow song, when I was trying to keep my dancing space at a respectable distance, Nancy pulled me tight and grabbed both cheeks of my ass, as in, I got seriously felt-up. By my mother-in-law. We still laugh about mom checking Deborah's merchandise.

Anyway, I knew Nancy could appreciate my humor. So Deborah talked to her mom for a few minutes, and her mom responded by writing a couple of notes, which Donna read to Deborah. When Deborah handed me the phone I said, "Nancy it's great to hear that you're doing better, and we sure do miss you. I heard that you were able to get up and walk around a little today. Was that gown you're wearing open in the back?"

Nancy almost choked on the breathing tube trying to laugh. Apparently, it's not easy to laugh after a tracheotomy and breathing tube are inserted with double pneumonia. After a second, Nancy wrote, "yes, my ass was hanging out," which Donna read over the phone. I wish I'd seen that.

Nancy is slowly recovering now and was finally discharged from the hospital after a 10 day stay. They had a very low key Thanksgiving in Massachusetts, but we all were very thankful that Nancy is on the mend and never lost her sense of humor.

Nancy, if you're reading, I want you to know that Deborah's got me looking for Salsa dancing lessons to work on my Latin dance moves. Don't be surprised when I see you next if we do a little dirty dancing.

On the other hand, I've already seen you do some of those moves after a couple glasses of Cabernet. Or was it with Chuck E Cheese?